Repeated criticism, exclusion, and subtle aggression at work can leave you feeling isolated and powerless. A psychiatrist explains why these patterns persist and what steps can help disrupt them
For some people, every new job brings the same old dread: colleagues who nitpick, undermine, or even cross physical boundaries. The sense of being targeted—whether through jokes, dismissive comments, or outright exclusion—can become so familiar that it feels inevitable. According to Dr. Stephen Franklin, a board-certified psychiatrist and psychotherapist, these patterns are rarely random. They often reflect deeper issues in group dynamics, communication style, or even the way we interpret social cues.
When someone finds themselves repeatedly singled out in different workplaces, it’s tempting to blame the environment or the people involved. Sometimes, that’s justified. Adult bullying—often called mobbing—can take many forms, from subtle sabotage to open ridicule. If you notice colleagues withholding information, spreading misinformation, or publicly devaluing your work, you may be facing a toxic group dynamic. Research shows that newcomers, those with less experience, or people who avoid confrontation are more likely to become targets.
But not every uncomfortable interaction is bullying. In some industries, especially those dominated by men, teasing and sarcasm are common forms of bonding. A slap on the back or a pointed joke might be intended as rough camaraderie, not hostility. The challenge is distinguishing between genuine aggression and cultural norms that simply don’t fit your style. This is where self-reflection and outside perspective matter. A mental health professional can help you sort out whether the problem lies in the group, your own boundaries, or a mix of both.
Franklin emphasizes that persistent patterns—feeling attacked or excluded in every job—may signal difficulties with social adaptation or interpersonal skills. Sometimes, past experiences shape how we interpret ambiguous behavior, making us more sensitive to perceived slights. In other cases, the workplace truly is toxic. Either way, the solution starts with a detailed assessment: What exactly is happening? How do you respond? Have you seen this before? Only after mapping out the facts can you decide whether to change your approach, seek support, or consider a different work environment.
For those who feel trapped in a cycle of workplace hostility, it’s important to know you’re not alone. According to the Workplace Bullying Institute, nearly 30% of American workers report being bullied at some point in their careers. The effects can be severe, leading to anxiety, depression, and even physical health problems. Early intervention—whether through HR channels, therapy, or peer support—can make a real difference. For more on how persistent anxiety can shape daily life, see this report on the struggle many new mothers face when returning to work.
Social adaptation is a complex process that goes beyond fitting in or following rules. It involves reading subtle cues, setting boundaries, and knowing when to push back or let things slide. Therapy can help people develop these skills, especially if past trauma or chronic stress has made social situations feel threatening. Group therapy, role-playing, and assertiveness training are all evidence-based approaches that can build confidence and resilience in challenging environments.
