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Dating Apps Are Flooded With Fetish Requests is a New Trend?

Daniel Mercer Editor-in-chief PsyTheater

Written by Daniel Mercer

Dating Apps Are Flooded With Fetish Requests—But a New Trend Is Raising Red Flags PsyTheater
Dating Apps Are Flooded With Fetish Requests—But a New Trend Is Raising Red Flags

Women on dating apps are reporting a surge in men asking about rituals to suppress love, not just foot fetishes, raising new questions about boundaries and safety

For years, women on dating apps have learned to expect the occasional odd request—foot fetishes, sock questions, and the like. But lately, a new pattern is emerging. More men are messaging about rituals to “get rid of love,” asking if women practice self-hypnosis, meditation, or emotional suppression. The shift is subtle but persistent, and it’s leaving many women uneasy about what’s really driving these conversations.

According to Psytheater.com, the rise of these requests isn’t just about changing sexual tastes. Dating app algorithms play a role. The more you engage with a certain type of user or topic, the more the platform serves up similar profiles. If you’ve ever mentioned meditation, spirituality, or emotional work in your bio, you may find yourself fielding questions that quickly veer into the strange or intimate. Men with niche interests tend to be more direct and memorable, so even rare fetishes can start to feel like a trend when the algorithm amplifies them.

There’s also the effect of online anonymity. People are bolder behind a screen. What someone would never say in a coffee shop, they’ll type out in a DM. The lack of face-to-face accountability lowers the bar for sharing taboo fantasies or asking invasive questions. For women, this means boundaries are tested early and often, sometimes before a real conversation even begins.

But it’s not just about the men. Sometimes, the way you present yourself online—mentioning mindfulness, rituals, or emotional growth—can attract people looking for someone to play out their own fantasies or scripts. If you don’t block or disengage, the cycle repeats. The result: a feed that feels less like a search for connection and more like a parade of projections and unmet needs.

Is this dangerous? Not inherently. Having a fetish or unusual fantasy doesn’t make someone a threat. What matters is how they handle your boundaries. Red flags include ignoring your discomfort, pushing for details after you’ve said no, or showing aggression when rebuffed. If someone treats you as a prop for their fantasy rather than a person, that’s a sign to move on.

Should you date someone with these interests? Only if you feel safe, curious, and respected. Compatibility isn’t about matching kinks—it’s about mutual respect and the ability to honor each other’s limits. If you’re exhausted by being seen as an object or a means to someone else’s end, it’s worth stepping back. There are plenty of ways to meet people—book clubs, volunteer groups, even movie trivia nights—where the focus is on shared interests, not secret scripts.

It’s easy to feel like you’re the only one dealing with this, but you’re not. Many women report feeling reduced to a single trait or fantasy on dating apps. The pressure to play along, or to tolerate discomfort for fear of missing out on a real connection, is real. But as this exploration of emotional boundaries in therapy relationships shows, the urge to cross lines isn’t limited to dating—it’s a broader issue of how we relate to each other in vulnerable spaces.

Ultimately, the best filter is your own sense of safety and interest. If a conversation feels off, trust that instinct. You’re not obligated to entertain anyone’s fantasy, no matter how common it seems online. And if you’re tired of the same patterns, changing how you engage—or where you look for connection—can shift the algorithm and your experience.

Fetish interests, especially those involving emotional rituals or suppression, often intersect with deeper questions about intimacy, control, and vulnerability. In therapy, these themes are explored with care and structure, helping people understand the roots of their desires and how they impact relationships. For those navigating dating apps, recognizing the difference between curiosity and coercion is key. Setting clear boundaries and seeking spaces where you’re valued as a whole person—not just a fantasy—can make all the difference in building healthy, respectful connections.

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